For example, I've considered that the first part, how I manage conflict in creativity can be split into two separate questions.. First, the conflict around me that impacts my time, my associations, limitations on resources, etc. Second, the more internal conflict that arises when a poem maybe wants to go one way and I stubbornly try to move it a different way.
On the surface I tend to think that I am free of conflict. And I honestly have successfully sold myself that bag of goods however, I can honestly say that in the past I have been conflicted both with people and situations where I have been a participant in a collective of other poets/artists. I can look back at those some years later and see that in some ways I took appropriate steps - at least to a point. While I may have felt I was moving on, I did so by pulling back somewhat in my broader participation - doing reading less often. Going to support others less often. While I don't think I consciously considered exactly what I was doing, I let myself be impacted by my actions in a far bigger way then I was acknowledging to myself. This is making me rethink the reasons I backed off some things. It can be sobering to realize that something can be going on in a much larger way then you are recognizing and this happen for several years.
The second or more inter-personal struggle directly with work is something that can happen day-in-day out.
Honestly I am not as well aware of it as I probably should be. This tells me one of two things...
- I either am so open to where my poem or work is leading me and there is no second-guessing
- Or, I'm resisting what the poem wants so effectively that I've pushed it out of the way and have my own stubborn agenda.
Honestly, I don't think it is bad to be conflicted with the poem, as long as you are listening to it. For one thing, you will feel better about the work if you feel like you have played a bit of a devil's advocate.
This is only looking a portion of what the Five of Muses is asking me to consider this week,. I'll address more later in the week.